Trust
by Piper21392
Summary: Olivia gets into real danger during she is trying to help a woman. WARNING: STRONG MA RATING, please, please don't read when you are under 18.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_She couldn't believe it: _

"_How did she get into this situation? How could he do this to her? How could she let herself get drugged?" _

_She felt the darkness coming, she tried to fight it, but she felt herself slipping down the wall. Right before she felt her eyes get shut she saw his face, she saw him coming towards her, reaching out his hands to grab her. When her eyes were already closed she felt his hands on her skin pulling her into his arms and lifting her up. _

_The last thought which was entering her brain was – I can't believe he is going to rape me and I'm not able to fight it._

_Then the darkness embraced her._

9 hours earlier.

Olivia was sitting at her desk. Elliot was in the interrogation room with this sick perp who was getting of by raping women and torture them. She went into the interrogation with Elliot, but the guy didn't respond to anything they said. He was only starring at her, with a mean smile on his face. Not at both of them, no, he was starring at her.

They both tried to get him talk, but as longer they were in the room with him as more he seemed to be far away.

After a while he closed his eyes and when she looked at her partner and met his eyes she knew he thought the same, the guy was getting off, probably by thinking how it would be to rape and torture her.

She saw the anger crawling up in Elliot and knew he would explode any minute. He can't handle when perps are coming up to her, even when it's only in there thoughts.

Right in the moment when she prepared herself to stop Elliot, to blow their only chance to get a confession from the guy, Huang opened the door and requested them out of the room.

He told them that the only chance to get the guy talk, is without Olivia and Elliot has to pretend that he understands the pleasure of rape and torture.

Now Olivia was sitting at her desk waiting for Elliot, she felt useless and she was pissed that this prick was not letting her do her job. There was a huge amount of paperwork waiting for her, but she was not in the mood to fight her way through it.

From the corner of her eye she saw Trevor Langan walking through the door. She couldn't believe it, there were already enough pricks around her for one day, there was no need for another one.

As far as she knew, the perp didn't ask for a lawyer yet, so she decided to start a conversation with Langan to keep him out of the interrogation.

Stepping towards him to say hello, he looked at her and started to smile. He said in a very charming and smooth tone: "Hello Detective Benson, you're exactly the person I'm looking for."

She was shocked by the tone and that she was the one that he was here for. But she tried to keep the surprise for herself and smiled back at him.

"So what can I do for you?" She asked really curious what he wanted from her.

He sat down on the chair next to her desk, she didn't know what to think of that, cause she didn't invite him to sit down, but she also kind of liked his self-confidence, so she sat at her place at the desk and kept looking at him.

"I need your help Detective." He started the conversation by getting right to the point she liked that.

"What do you need my help for?"

He looked down at his lap for a minute before he answered and she could swear his voice got a little quieter.

"I think the wife of a client of mine does need help. I already tried to talk to her, but he is always around her and it's almost impossible to talk to her alone."

Trevor Langan one of the most annoying lawyers she knows, is asking her to help a woman. Normally he would be the guy helping the abusing husband to go back home to his wife in a minute.

She must have looked at him disbelievingly cause he started to defend himself:

"I know you think I'm a prick, who sends the shit you collected home to their families to start all over again. But I defended you too and got you out of jail last year." He was smiling at her. "Don't you think everyone has the right to be defended at court?"

Anger was crawling up her stomach she was leaning in to him.

"My partner got me out of jail, by getting the evidence that I was fooled. You did almost nothing," she whispered roughly.

He leaned back in his chair, he seemed tired and he started to rub his hands over his face. "Okay!Look, there is a woman and I think her husband is beating her and I don't know what I can do, I really need your help."

Olivia thought of Mia, the women who was killed by her husband, after Langan helped him to get out of jail.

"I know, maybe that's the reason why I'm here, do you really think I don't feel the guilt for the death of this woman on my shoulders?" He suddenly said out of the blue and for a second she thought he can read her mind.

And when she looked into his eyes she saw it, he really felt bad about Mia's death.

"Okay, so what do you want me to do? I have to talk to her before I can do anything against her husband."

He started smiling again. "Yeah, I know." And she could swear his smile was wolfish.

"I meet this client for dinner tonight and he invited me with a guest, I pick you up at 8."

Before she could respond to that, Elliot stepped to the desk. Langan stood up and greeted him.

Elliot's asking view burned her skin, she tried to avoid his gaze.

She nodded at Langan and he left quickly, maybe he was afraid she would start to talk to Elliot about the whole thing. And right when she ended this thought, Elliot was asking curiously what Langan was doing here.

"He wanted to talk to me about my case, there are still some things to handle in court."

Elliot looked at her disbelievingly. "What, it's more than a year since that?" She regretted lying at him and didn't know why she was lying at him in the first place.

"Did you get a confession?" Now it was at him to feel uncomfortable he nodded and tried to pretend that there was laying something really important on his desk.

Relieved that she was not longer the one who felt weird she smiled at him. But she already lost the battle with Langan and so she didn't want to let Elliot get off so easily.

So she sat down leaned back in her chair and started teasing Elliot. "Come on, what were you two talking about?" It was a great feeling to see how Elliot tried to get out of the conversation and she enjoyed it.

"Ah, he is a stupid asshole. He confessed the rapes and the torture and he didn't ask for a lawyer. So we get him of the streets."

"Oh, come on El, give me a little more, you know I hate when this sickos are so addicted to there stuff that they aren't even able to be in the same room with a women, without thinking of raping and torture her. How did you get him?"

She knew exactly what Elliot had to do, to get the guy.

Pretending that he was thinking himself how it would be, to rape and to over power her, to force her to have sex with him. Even before Huang pulled them out of the interrogation, she knew this guy would only confess by sharing his sick thoughts with someone who understands him.

"Liv, what ever Langan told you, don't punish me for it."

Now she was pissed, it wasn't her day, first she lost the battle against Langan now she lost the battle against Elliot, which happened rarely.

8 hours earlier.

She decided that it's time to go home.

It was almost three and she knew this is the day to take some of the extra hours she collected. She looked at Elliot and informed him about her plan and he said that it shouldn't be a problem, their latest perp was already caught and all the other cases could wait one day longer.

She went into Cragens office and after assuring him that she wasn't sick, cause he couldn't believe that he don't have to force her to take free time, she left the precinct.

She went home took a long bath, read a book and was thinking about Langan and his plan to have dinner with a guy who beats his wife. How does he think is this dinner supposed to be, she can't ask the woman right away if her husband is gonna beat her when they leave. But she also knew that she would immediately know if she is an abused woman or not, she saw to many of them and knows the signs. The harassed eyes, the flinching when the husband speaks, the pain written over the whole body.

5hours earlier.

She was standing in front of her wardrobe, she imagined that Langan would be dressed nicely. He is always wearing expensive, very well fitting suits. When he is going out to have dinner with a client, she imagined, that he would look unbelievably good.

She took a short, but not too short well fitting black dress with a nice neckline and high heels. When she was standing in front of the mirror to check her outfit, she was satisfied, it looked sexy but not slutty and not to sexy that it would be inappropriate to wear it to a business dinner.

4 hours earlier.

At 8 o'clock sharp her doorbell was ringing and she wasn't surprised, she knew he would be right on time, he is this kind of guy.

She left her apartment to meet him on the street and took a sharp breath. He was standing in front of his Mercedes and she was right, he was wearing a very well fitting black suit, she suddenly had an image of Clark Kent in her head. She recognized before, that he is a very good looking man and she also recognized that he is very tall, which was always something she liked on man, cause she is tall too.

But now seeing him in his suit leaning against his Mercedes smiling at her, she felt getting nervous, which was new to her.

He stepped in front of her to say hello and opened the car door for her. When she was sitting at the passenger seat he circled the car to get to the driver seat. Wondering if he was thinking the same about her, she hoped instantly that he didn't saw her face when she stepped out of the building.

During the drive they were talking a little bit about their strategy, but it was only a 20minute drive so there wasn't a lot talking. Except that he told the guy that he would bring his girlfriend and that it would be better to call him Trevor, so that they don't get caught in the first 2minutes.

When they entered the house he introduced her to Timothy and Gwen Palmer. He told them that she is a colleague and she appreciated that he didn't degrade her and told them she was his secretary.

They had a nice dinner and after only ten minutes she was absolutely sure that this woman was beaten by her husband on a regular base.

1hour earlier.

She was thinking how and when she shall tell Langan about it, when she recognized that they were talking about her.

So she focused back on their conversation and couldn't believe what they were talking about. This guy was telling Langan how fucking gorgeous he finds her and that it must be a pleasure to sleep with her.

She was used to Elliot's reaction to any man who says that about her and she couldn't believe that Langan was sitting there saying nothing to that. She took a look at Gwen but she was only smiling a weary smile.

Right when she opened her mouth to respond to that, Langan leaned close to her, took her hand and said with a wolfish smile: "You wouldn't believe what kind of pleasure it is."

She was pissed and only an inch away from exposing the truth. But Langan blinked at her and she calm herself down.

20minutes earlier.

After dessert Timothy went to the house bar to make drinks for them and his wife apologized herself to the kitchen, she offered her help to get to talk with the women alone.

But they had only a few minutes in the kitchen and it was difficult to get her to talk in this kind of situation, to a stranger during a business dinner.

So she left and decided it would be the best to talk about everything with Langan first and they decide together what they do. Or even better she waits and talks with Elliot about it the next day and they discuss their options to make it an official SVU case.

10minutes earlier.

She went back to the living room, Langan gave her a Martini and they were sitting down on the couch. Trevor took place right next to her and Timothy on the opposite side so she was kind of trapped between them.

Suddenly Timothy was laying his hand on her knee and Langan put his arm around her and it hit her, she stared at the almost empty Martini glass in her hand and she already felt a warm tickling in her stomach. She stood up and apologized herself to the bathroom, she still couldn't believe that she was right, that can't be true. As a huge prick as Langan is, as a lawyer, he wouldn't bring her in a situation like this.

She went into the bathroom, but she already felt really weak and she knew this wouldn't come from only one Martini, she started panicking she searched her cell phone, but it was in her bag in the living room.

3minutes earlier.

She forgot to lock the bathroom door. And so Timothy came in, he smiled at her and stepped towards her, she stepped back and walked into the wall behind her. She felt dizzy and weak and she knew that there was something in her drink. He pinned her against the wall, and came really close and whispered: "Hell yeah, it's gonna be a huge pleasure for me to fuck you." She felt his hand on her wrist sliding down to her thigh pushing up her dress. She tried to remember what she could do in this kind of situation, but it was so hard to think at all.

_She couldn't believe it: _

"_How did she get into this situation? How could he do this to her? How could she let herself get drugged?" _

_She felt the darkness coming, she tried to fight it, but she felt herself slipping down the wall. Right before she felt her eyes get shut she saw his face, she saw Trevor Langan in the door. He was coming towards her, reaching out his hands to grab her. When her eyes were already closed she felt his hands on her skin pulling her into his arms and lifting her up. _

_The last thought which was entering her brain was – I can't believe he is going to rape me and I'm not able to fight it._

_Then the darkness embraced her._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Elliot was called in the middle of the night, when he was walking through the hospital aisle the doctor was giving him the facts. 43 year old woman brought in drugged and unconscious, in the tox screen they found Rohypnol, the first exam didn't show any signs of penetration and the guy who brought her in, said she wasn't raped. Elliot stopped walking. "Which guy?" The doctor stopped too and said: "A man brought her in, he said he was her date."

"Elliot looked confused, he drugged her and then he got remorse and brought her into the hospital instead of raping her?"

The doctor hiked his shoulders and pointed to a room, she is still unconscious but we're pretty busy tonight and it will took a while before we can do the rape kid. Maybe she is waking up first. Elliot wanted to say something but the doctor was already gone and so he entered the room.

He froze in the middle of the movement, in front of him was Olivia laying in the bed.

He felt panic in his stomach he reached to the bed screaming her name and started shaking her and then begging her to wake up. To tell him that everything is alright and that she wasn't raped, while he was at home sleeping in his bed.

She tried to open her eyes but her eyelids were really heavy and she wasn't exactly sure if she really wanted them to be open. She moaned and heard a voice, a very familiar voice, calling her name. She decided that it would be worth to open her eyes. Elliot was standing in front of the bed she was laying in, which she recognized as a hospital bed.

Panic was written all over his face. "El, what's wrong?" She tried to move every part of her body to check if she was shot, but she didn't feel any pain, but suddenly she thought - maybe that isn't a good sign, cause Elliot wouldn't be so damn scared when there wasn't something really wrong.

"Liv, you are in the hospital. Can you remember anything?"

The door was pushed open and Munch came in, like Elliot before he froze in the middle of his movement and then only said: "Elliot?"

Elliot turned his head and said, "call Cragen." Munch left the room, to do so.

"El, what happened?"

"I don't know Liv, I was hoping you could tell me."

She tried to remember and there was a picture in her head. Trevor Langan leaning against his Mercedes, and she remembered. "Oh my god El, they drugged me, did they rape me?"

"No, no Liv the doctor said there weren't any signs of rape."

"But El, I was drugged, I couldn't fight them, so there are probably no signs of forced penetration."

She could read in his worried face that she was right. She felt tears running down her face.

"Did they do a rape kid, yet?"

"No, the nurse is coming soon."

"Liv, who drugged you?"

"I was out with …" she swallowed hard. "Ah, I was out with Langan."

He couldn't believe it. "You were out with who?"

"It wasn't what you think it was, he asked me for help. We went to a dinner to one of his clients, he is beading his wife."

"Liv, did you get drugged there?"

"She felt her throat getting really tight. "Yes." She whispered.

"How did I get here?"

He remembered that the doctor said that she was brought by a man who pretended to be her date. But he couldn't tell her that.

"Liv, try to rest a little I go and grab a tea for you, okay?"

He wanted desperately to get out to see the man who brought her into the hospital. He didn't wanna leave her, but he had to go out to kill this guy, to push him into a wall, push his fists in his face to feel his blood streaming down his hands.

Luckily Munch was coming back in and he told her that Munch would stay with her as long as he is going to grab the tea.

He was walking right in to the waiting area and he could see Langan sitting there. He immediately jumped at him pushing him into the next wall. The guy was about 8 inches taller than him, but he didn't care.

"What to hell did you do to my partner, you sick bastard?"

Langan didn't fight him, this was poor self protection, he knew Elliot has the ability to kill him when he is so incredibly furious.

"I didn't do this, I took her to a client he drugged her drink. I swear I didn't know this. She went to the bathroom, my client left too and I got a bad feeling. I checked for them and found him pinning her against a wall. She was already loosing consciousness. I pushed him away and brought her right to the hospital." "I didn't know that he would do something like that with me sitting in the next room!"

"I don't believe you, you set her up, you wanted this too, and then you decided it may be to dangerous to rape a cop. And you weren't willing to kill a cop and it would be the only chance to make her stop talking. You knew she would nail you and you got scared."

Langan started now to fight against Elliot's holding. "I didn't try to rape her and if I would have known that she is in danger there, I wouldn't have brought her there."

"Detective Stabler can I talk to you for a minute?" Cragen entered the waiting area and tried to get his Detective out of the situation immediately.

"What to hell happened, Elliot?" "Munch called me, he said Olivia is in the hospital cause she was raped."

"No, she wasn't raped, the doctor said there weren't any signs!"

Elliot felt really weak, he knew he had to sit down immediately, before his knees wouldn't be able to carry his weight anymore.

"I have to go back to Olivia, Munch is waiting with her!"

Cragen followed his Detective, he felt the weakness of Elliot and it made him nervous, cause he expected a lot from him anger, hate and violence but weakness made him really nervous.

They went back to Olivia's room. Munch tried to talk Olivia into staying, but she was already up and was searching for her clothes.

"I go home now."

"Liv, you can't go home." You were drugged and …." he paused. "You need the rape kid done."

"I wasn't raped. I'm fine, all I want is to go home."

Cragen took one look over the scene and requested Munch out of the room.

Elliot was walking to the chair in front of the bed and fell into it.

"Liv!"

"El, there are two possibilities either you drive me home or I go by myself."

"Langan is waiting outside, he brought you here when you were unconscious!"

That finally got her, she sat down on the bed.

"He is still here?"

"Yes, he is waiting outside. You know, I don't like this guy, but I'm not sure if he is involved in getting you drugged."

"Elliot, when I slipped down this wall, feeling the darkness coming, his face was the last thing I saw."

"Liv, I'm the first one who is killing this guy when I know for sure that he did something to you, but..."

"But, what?"

"I believe him!"

"He was worried when this guy, you had dinner with, was leaving short after you. He went looking for you and when he found him pinning you against a wall, he pushed him away and he brought you here."

"I have to talk to him!"

"What? That's not gonna happen!"

"Elliot, I don't have the strength to fight with you right now. I said I wanna talk to him and I meant what I said."

When Elliot stepped into the waiting area he saw Cragen and Munch talking to Langan. He sent Langan into Olivia's room and followed him, but Olivia praised him away.

Olivia was looking in Langans eyes, she knew if he was lying when she would look into his eyes.

"I have to know what happened!"

"Olivia, I found Timothy in the bathroom with you!"

"He was pinning me against the wall, touching me."

He flinched when she said that, the thought of it made him feel uncomfortable.

"Yes, I pushed him away and I grasped you."

"I know, the last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was your face, I thought you were going to rape me."

She looked him into his eyes and saw how shocked he was.

"You should have talked to me, I don't know if I would have believed you, but I thought you were Timothy's partner."

"I'm so sorry." He was looking at his tiptoes.

"He didn't raped me, or did he?"

"No, he didn't, I swear. When I came in he was pinning you against the wall and he pushed up your dress, but there wasn't even time to touch you!"

She felt really tired and Elliot was right, she believed him too.

"You not gonna defend him in court, when we nail him for assaulting me, aren't you?" She smiled at him.

And he smiled back and said: "Never ever is that gonna happen."

After he left, Elliot came back in, he told her that Cragen and Munch went out to get Timothy Palmer.

"Elliot I need sleep, I feel so tired."

He was surprised by this confession, she normally wouldn't admit weakness.

"Okay, I drive you home, we can get your statement tomorrow."

When she went into her apartment she felt unbelievably tired and she was glad that Elliot insisted on bringing her not only upstairs but also right inside.

She went straight into her bedroom and laid down fully dressed. She didn't know if it were the drugs or anything else, but she heard herself saying: "Elliot can you stay until I fell asleep?"

He raised his eyebrow and he was glad that she couldn't see that, cause she was laying with her back to him.

He laid down very close to her, spooned her and put his arm around her waist. She let him do this and it really worried him, she would kick his butt when he would do this under normal circumstances.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Three days were gone since that. Olivia was sitting in her apartment and asked herself if it was a good idea to allow Langan to come over.

Timothy Palmer was out on bail and he hired one of Langans' expensive colleagues, but she helped his wife to leave him. She wasn't sure if Gwen would make it through court, but for now she was safe.

Langan insisted in apologizing to her and so she allowed him to come over. She wasn't exactly sure if this was a good idea. She had to grin when she thought of Elliot's reaction when he would know that Langan is going to visit her. He was still very angry, cause in his mind it was Langan who brought her in danger.

She was surprised when Langan walked in with full bags from the grocery store. He simply said he is going to cook because she refused to go into a restaurant with him.

Again she was fascinated by his self-confidence and she pointed to the kitchen and said: "Have fun, but don't think that I'm gonna help you, I hate to cook."

He grinned at her and started to look around her kitchen to orientate around the foreign environment.

He made antipasti, fish and a dessert. He gave her the plate with the antipasti when he prepared it. And told her to keep him company, that wasn't a huge problem her apartment isn't exactly huge and so she sad on one of her stools leaned on the kitchen cabinet and tried to figure out which from the things of the antipasti plate she was gonna try next. There were cooked eggplants with salt and olive oil, bruschetta, shrimps and mozzarella with tomato and basil.

She picked one of the shrimps, it was hilarious, but she never ate that much garlic with one bite.

"Are you trying to make this evening as uncomfortable as possible for me."

He looked up and was clearly confused.

"It is delicious, but I never ate this much garlic in my whole life."

He smiled wolfish walked over to her, took one of the shrimps and then leaned forward and kissed her. After that, he through the shrimp caught it with his mouth and said:

"I love garlic."

She was shocked but tried not to show it. She wasn't sure if it was self-confidence or if it was pure arrogance what he was showing. But she felt herself get aroused, she liked this attitude.

The fish was incredible and when they went to the couch to drink some more wine she was already thinking how it would be to sleep with him.

The whole evening they talked about everything but work and it was great. He has two sisters, his mother is dead but his father is well and enjoying his pension. He was a construction worker and all he got in life was built on hard work. And so was it with Trevor, he had during his studies two jobs and had always worked very hard for everything. He is godfather of a five year old girl named Samantha and the whole family is still coming together on every holiday.

When it was at her to talk about her family, she started with the usual. Her mother raised her alone, she was an English professor and since she died there is no family left. For one second she thought of telling him about Simon, but when she would tell him about her brother she have to talk about her father too and she couldn't do this yet.

He looked at her and she knew that he knows, he must have, cause she was often enough in court to testify against one of his clients and a lawyer like him is always prepared perfectly.

But he was looking at her really interested and didn't give her the feeling that she has to tell more, or that he knows that she is telling only the half of the truth.

It was easy with him and she felt really comfortable and that happens really, really rarely.

He went back to the kitchen and came back with one plate, one spoon and the peach mousse. She was confused but he took the spoon put it into the mousse and hold it in front of her. She leaned in and put her mouth over the spoon. Then she went back slowly and took the mousse with her. He was grinning and put some mousse on his index finger.

He licked it from his own finger and Olivia felt herself getting wet. He put his finger back in the mousse and this time he hold it in front of her.

She put her mouth over his finger and played around it with her tongue, when the mousse was gone she sucked at the finger, only a little bit, but it was enough to make him wriggle around nervously.

When she left his finger free, he put the mousse onto the table and turned around to look into her eyes. He leaned in and kissed her, it was a soft kiss but full of passion and she responded on it. She put her tongue in his mouth and put her hand onto his hip. That must have been what he was waiting for, he laid his hands on both of her hips and pulled her towards him. Than he laid onto her. He was heavy, but it felt fantastic and she was already very wet, she felt the wetness painfully between her legs.

One of his hands started to open her blouse and then he cupped one of her breasts. She felt his dick getting aroused, he was pressed against her and she wanted to feel him even closer.

He stopped kissing her and put both of his hands next to her on the couch. He lifted his body up and looked into her eyes.

"I wanna fuck you, deep and long and I'm not gonna do this on your couch." He shoved his left arm under her body and pushed himself up, taking her with him. There was it again, arrogance or self-confidence she wasn't sure, but she didn't care either, she wanted him desperately.

She didn't know why, but she trusted him deeply and she liked it that he was taking the lead. She always has to be strong, in her life, in her job, everywhere and every time. She likes it to give the leadership away in bed, but she has to trust the man before she can give herself away completely.

He started kissing her again during their way into the bedroom. When they arrived at the bed he twisted around and got down to sit on the bed. She was standing in front of him. He is so tall and his head was at the height of her belly now. He laid his index finger onto a point between her breasts, her blouse was already open from the action on the couch and so he slid down slowly. She felt getting goosebumps. He stopped at the button of her pants but only for a short time and then he slid further down. When he was down at her private parts he took his whole hand and cupped it. She moaned a little and she thought that he had to feel her wetness through the fabric. He grinned and ordered her: "Get your clothes off!"

She can't tell why she was trusting him so unconditionally but she did. She stepped out of her shoes, let her blouse sliding down slowly and unbuttoned her pants.

"Stop, put your bra off first!" She couldn't believe that she was following his orders, he did nothing to earn her trust. She opened her bra and let it fell on the floor.

Then she opened the zip of her pants and pushed it down slowly. She stepped out of it and stood in front of him in her panties, he was still completely dressed, he even wore his tie.

"Now your panties!" She waited, looked at him and asked herself if she gave him to much control.

"Shall I put it off of you?" He asked and his tone was defying.

What to hell is wrong with you, she asked herself, you would never give a man you barley know this much control over you.

But at the same time she felt the unbelievably strong wetness between her legs which was already moisten the inside of her thighs. She licked her lips, more because of her tension than to arouse him.

She shoved her hand under the elastic of her panties and pulled it off.

Now she was standing in front of him completely nude. He was sitting on her bed looking at her, it felt like forever, he was watching every inch of her body and his eyes burned her skin.

Then he stood up and walked around her, it was weird and almost painful to be patterned like this. When he stood in front of her again, he crabbed her left wrist with his right hand and twisted around, suddenly she was in front of him with her backside pressed against his body. He walked to the bed, her hand was on her back like in a police grip, but he didn't hurt her and she knew that she would get of easily if she wanted to.

He laid down and buried her under him. She turned her head to the side and waited for him to do what ever he wanted to do. He slipped off of her and laid on his side know. He searched her eyes.

She was laying on her belly and he was laying on his right side. He supported his head with his right hand and laid his left hand on her back. He looked the whole time into her eyes, when he started to wander down her back. When he arrived her ass he stopped and held on for a second. Then he spread her ass cheeks with his thumb and his middle finger and teased her with his index finger. She moaned loud and he smiled at her reaction. When he started teasing her stronger she was flinching and he stopped.

He sat up, laid his left hand at her left hip and pulled her over until her ass was pressed against his dick, he was still fully dressed.

He took her left hand and pulled it over her head, then he took her right hand and pulled it over her head too. He was laying on his right forearm and held both of her wrists in his right hand. He started sliding done her body again with his left hand, faster this time and started teasing her again between her ass cheeks. She struggled a little but she wanted it and he knew it. But when he started to push his index finger inside her, she tore her head around and searched his eyes. "No!"

He held her view for a second and started to kiss her, his left hand was wandering to the front side of her body. He spread her legs and laid his hand on her private parts.

"Oh, my god you're already wet enough to push deep inside," she felt his Dick getting hard.

Suddenly he stopped again. "Do you wanna see me now?" She nodded and he stood up. She was sitting up looking at him. He slowly opened his tie. He opened his shirt, button for button and threw it on the floor when he was done.

He opened his belt and pulled his pants and his boxer shorts down in the same movement. Now he was standing in front of her completely nude. She couldn't stop herself, she needed a little control back. So she stood up and walked around him slowly, damn he is fucking gorgeous, she can't believe it. He is trained very well. His belly muscles are unbelievable. She walked around him and when she was in front of him and met his eyes again she could see that he was enjoying it.

She started to slide down his chest with both hands he felt great, warm, soft and strong the same time.

He was already aroused. She took his dick into her hand and started to stroke it, he moaned and she finally felt a little control coming back, but the same time she wanted him to take over again.

And he did, again she thought – "Can he read my mind?"

He took both of her wrists and hold them together behind her back and started kissing her, first soft but then with more pressure. And he was walking to the bed pushing her softly in the right direction. He released her hands when they arrived at the bed but he didn't stop kissing her and she took the opportunity to cup his face with her hands.

They laid down and he stopped kissing her. Again he was laying next to her but this time she was not laying on her belly she was laying on her back. He started stroking her at her breasts teasing her nipples but only for a short time and then his hand was wandering between her legs.

It was almost embarrassing how wet she was, but he moaned when he felt her wetness.

He entered her with two fingers and she was so wet that it didn't feel enough, she needed more, she needed him inside of her. She moaned loud, he grinned and said: "Not so fast honey!" Cause she already tightened herself around his fingers to feel more pressure. He started teasing her clit and pushing his fingers inside of her. She was almost coming, but every time when she was close to get over the edge he stopped and waited for her to come down.

After a few times she looked at him desperately and when their eyes met, he leaned close to her head and whispered: "I want you to beg me, to make you come!"

She didn't like that, he is a fucking one night stand, she is not gonna beg him. She is to long working for SVU. Men who want the woman to beg in bed feel always suspicious to her.

He looked into her eyes and his look was burning her. She didn't know what was wrong and if she wouldn't have seen how he prepared the food she would swear that he put something inside it. Cause suddenly she could hear herself saying: "Please, make me come!" he grinned again and said: "That's not enough, you can do this better!"

She closed her eyes and saw her whole life like a movie before her eyes. Why had she always have to be so damn strong, she wanted to be weak too, she wanted someone who takes care, who leads her, who holds her in his arms when she needs it, and tells her what to do, not always but sometimes. Only sometimes she wants to let go everything and don't be herself anymore.

And so she said in a voice which didn't a little bit sound like her:

"Please, please make me come!"

He moaned and slid on top of her, she could feel his aroused penis against her entry. He started kissing her again and he was playing with her left breast he was pressing her nipple almost hurtful but it made the wetness between her legs only stronger. With his right hand he was stroking her clit and she felt herself very close to the edge when he started pushing inside of her. His thrusts were deep and long and it was enough to make her fall and she groaned out loud and felt herself getting tight around him. And it put him over the edge too. After a few more thrusts he stopped and fell on top of her. He was so heavy and pressed her deep into the bed and when she had the control over her arms back she embraced him pulling him even closer and for one time in her life she didn't care about the fact how desperate this must have looked to him. She wanted him to stay right there inside of her forever.

And he did.

But after a few minutes he was lifting up his head searching her eyes.

"I must crush you?"

She didn't want him to leave but she knew that she had to release him. So she opened her embrace and gave him the leverage to move. He pulled out of her and slid down to lay next to her.

He started stroking her hair and she turned her head to look into his eyes. He was smiling, not grinning like before, it was a warm smile and she felt getting nervous again.

"I'm sorry."

Confusion was showing on her face.

"I told you I wanna meet you to apologize."

"And you think that's the right moment to do that?"

"Well, yes I think I showed you my deep regrets and I wanted to verbalize it too."

She started laughing.

"Well, okay I accept your apology."

"Really, you already accepted it?"

"Yes I do."

"That's too bad." His hand spread her legs apart stroking softly over her curls.

"Cause I prepared myself to apologize at leased three or four times before you gonna accept it. But if your already satisfied." He stopped stroking and pulled his hand away.

"No. I don't accept it! It wasn't enough, you brought me into real danger and you didn't apologize hard enough until now."

Now he was laughing. He started stroking her again and felt her wetness already weeping down his hand. So he pushed one finger inside her, but she was so wet that he almost couldn't feel her, so he pushed another one. And when he was entering with his third finger he was looking into her eyes to get her permission. But she was already far away, she was pushing against his hand and she was moaning, so he started to push his fingers deep inside her and started kissing her again. He slid onto her and leaned next to her ear.

"Can you handle more?"

She managed to open her eyes and nodded and spread her legs a little bit more to show him that she understood what he said and that she wanted him to do it. So he took a fourth finger and pushed inside of her. For a short moment she was flinching and inhaled sharply, she never let a man do this. But when he was pulling back she grasped his wrist and held his hand where it was.

He was moving now carefully and listened to her moans if they were still out of lust, or if they were out of pain.

He was looking at her and he couldn't believe how beautiful she was, her body was lifting up from the bed and she was clawing into the sheet, cause she was so blown away by the movement of his hand between her legs and her moans were getting louder and louder and he couldn't stop himself smiling at her. He wanted to hold her, he was already painfully aroused only by watching her enjoying his actions, so he needed his own relief when he brought her over the edge again. But then he wanted to hold her, laying next to her, she must look unbelievably beautiful while she is sleeping and he couldn't wait watching her sleep.

"Fist me!"

"What?"

"Please, Trevor fist me!"

He wasn't sure so he leaned over her face and kissed her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am! Please do it!"

She spread her legs and grasped his wrist again.

"Please!"

He slowly spread his fingers apart to feel if there was enough space to enter his thumb into her and she responded with a deep moan. So he carefully pushed his thumb into her. She screamed but held his hand in place. She was so unbelievably wet and he was so turned on that he was thinking of doing a hand job on himself cause his erection started to hurt. He was carefully building a fist inside of her and after a short scream of pain he felt her whole body shaking and tightening she was screaming of pleasure and then she fell back on the bed and didn't move anymore. After pulling out his hand, he laid next to her and held her in his arms, she was breathing hard and her skin was wet with sweat and she tasted salty.

He needed relief too, cause his erection was still painful and seeing her having this great orgasm didn't help at all to make the pain go away on the contrary he thought he couldn't stand it any second longer. So he was wandering with one hand to his penis to get the pressure off.

But Olivia got herself enough together to recognize his need and was faster than him and closed her hand around his dick. But she wanted more, she couldn't handle him inside right now but she wanted to taste him so she pushed herself away from him and pulled her mouth over his penis. He was groaning out loud and it was almost enough to make him come. But she started sucking him and playing around his dick with her tongue and that all together, watching her and now being in her mouth was to much and he came after only a few seconds. She swallowed everything and enjoyed the taste of him.

Now she was laying next to him wondering if he was getting up now to leave. It's always different with one night stands sometimes she wants them to stay and sometimes she wants them to leave, so that she can sleep better.

But she definitely wanted Trevor to stay, but after holding him tight after her first orgasm and practically begging him to fist her, she simply couldn't ask him to stay.

He smiled at her again and then he was sitting up and her throat was closing. He leaned over the bed to pull up the blankets which fell on the floor during their bed action. He laid back next to her offering his open arm for her to lay onto his breast.

There was it again, this arrogance, he even didn't think about that she might want him to leave, but then she remembered that she 2 minutes ago was wishing that he would stay tonight and she swallowed her pride down and snuggled up into his embrace. He softly laid the blankets over them and she slid into sleep, feeling his warm body holding her.

He was watching her a few minutes and he was right, she was unbelievably beautiful when she was sleeping.


	4. Chapter 4

Olivia turned around and watched Trevor while he was sleeping, she couldn`t stop herself touching him. She touched his hair and let her hand travelling down his body over his forehead, his cheek down to his chest. He started to smile and opened his eyes. "Are you already ready for another round?", he asked with a cheeky smile on his face.

She was almost to embarrassed to show him how ready she was but he didn`t wait for an answer, he pushed his hand between her legs and entered her with his finger. She closed her eyes and bit her lip. She waited for the movement of his finger but there was nothing, she just felt his finger inside. She opened her eyes again and met his. He was still smiling but his smile turned from cheeky to wolfish, he pulled his finger back outside and hold it in front of her to lick her own wetness off of him. She did it, like she did almost everything he wanted from her that night. Where the hell was this trust coming from, normally she wasn`t a trustful person at all.

He sat up a little and leaned on his elbow to support his head with his hand. He stroke her hair and put a strand of it gently behind her ear. "Where are your cuffs?", he asked, with a tone as he would ask for the butter at the breakfast table. For a second she wasn`t sure where she put it cause she was so exited and nervous and scared. Even the thought of what he wanted to do with her cuffs made her feelings go crazy.

"They are outside on the kitchen table.", she couldn`t hide the tension and his wolfish smile turned bigger. He stood up and left the bedroom and before she could even think if she was ready to have sex with him, being cuffed, he was standing in the doorframe and was holding her cuffs in his hand.

He came back to the bed and sat on the edge of it. She turned around to face him and was still thinking about what was going on and how far she wanted to go.

He leaned down and started to kiss her very gently and she enjoyed feeling his tongue wander through her mouth. Subconsciously she felt how he took her hand and pulled it over her head but she didn`t care, she concentrated on his soft lips, his tongue and his taste. She got distracted when he took her other hand and pulled it over her head too. He hold both of her hands with one hand and took his other hand to spread her legs and enter her again and he was still kissing her. How did he do that, he was everywhere and she felt soft waves of pleasure coming and then she heard the familiar click of her cuffs and felt the cold metal on her wrists.

She flashed back to the basement where a prisonguard almost raped her during an undercover assignment and she froze, she couldn`t scream or fight or even ask him to stop, what he surely would have done. She just froze and her stomach turned sick and she had the feeling that she needed to puke.

He started to kiss her breast and his tongue was playing with her nipple and she felt a single tear running down her face, she wanted him to stop and to uncuff her but it was still impossible for her to speak or move. His hand spread her legs again and he pushed his finger inside, finally she got the ability to move her muscles back and started to fight against the cuffs and then she screamed out a loud "No".

"No, please stop, please stop!"

Trevor jumped on the unexpected scream and stopped his action immediately. "Please uncuff me! Trevor, please take them off, take them off!", Olivia cried in pain and fear. Trevor was confused, he saw her cuffed before and everytime since he saw her sitting cuffed on a bench and waiting for her lawyer, he wanted to sleep with her and use her handcuffs during he would gently explore her whole body. Back than she didn`t seem scared or in pain and he couldn`t explain himself why she was so scared now.

Olivia was still crying and he knew it was serious, he realized that he didn`t know where the keys were. They weren`t with the cuffs when he took them from the kitchen table.

"Olivia, I don`t know where the keys are, you need to tell me where they are?" He took her head and turned it around, he didn`t wanna hurt her but she wasn`t listening and she started to fight against the cuffs, he was scared that she would hurt herself. He tried to stop her and hold her tight so that she would focus on him and not on the cuffs and the pain.

Olivia felt him holding her thight and she didn`t want that, the only thing she wanted was that he would take the cuffs off. Why didn`t he stop, why didn`t he listen to her. She shouldn`t have trusted him, he would rape her, he would take advantage of her and there was nothing what she could do against it.

Trevor took Olivia`s head between both of his hands and said her name as gently and silent as he could and it seemed as she finally reacted to his efforts to bring her back to reality.


	5. Chapter 5

¨Olivia, I`m gonna take the cuffs off, I swear but you need to tell me where the key is.¨

Olivia tried to concentrate on Trevors`s voice, he was talking to her but she didn`t understand what he was saying.

¨Olivia, look at me, tell me where the key is and I swear I take them off.¨

¨ It is in the pocket of my pants.¨, she finally understood what he was saying, she came slowly back from one of the worst places she has ever been.

Trevor jumped out of the bed and searched for Olivia`s pants, they were still laying on the floor where she let them fall when he ordered her to undress. He found the key in her left pocket and went quickly back to the bed to uncuff her. Olivia jumped up and ran to the bathroom where she started to vomit.

Trevor couldn`t believe what just happened. How did this beautiful night end up like this?

Olivia stood up and tried to refresh herself with cold water, she knew that she had to tell Trevor what just happened when she leaves the bathroom and so she was buying herself a little time by looking into the mirror. She didn`t know how long she was standing there watching herself but she heard something behind her and she turned around and saw Trevor standing at the bathroom door.

¨ Are you okay?¨, he almost shyly asked.

¨ Yes, I`m okay. Could you wait for me in the living room? I`m gonna dress and then I explain to you what just happened, okay?¨

He responded a little to quick that he will wait in the living room for her, she must have really scared him.

She heard him dressing and leaving the bedroom. She went outside and took some comfortable clothes out of her closet. After she had dressed, she took a deep breath and went into the living room. Trevor was sitting on the couch and was nervously playing with his hands. She sat next to him to assure him that she was fine having him close by her side. But she realized that she wanted to face him while she was talking to him so she placed herself at the end of the couch with the armrest in her back. He did the same on the otherside. She pulled her legs up and embraced them.

¨A few years ago I had an undercover assignment in a prison, we were looking for a guard who forced the inmates to get drugs into the jail and he raped the women who he should have cared for. It escalated when he raped the 16 year old daughter of an inmate to blackmail her. So I went into the prison to find out who he was. I suspected the wrong guy and let my guard down. So the real perp brought me to the basement where they...¨, she swallowed hard and couldn`t go on talking. She looked up and was searching for his eyes, he just looked back. She never told anyone, except her therapist, what happened in the basement, even Elliot didn`t know until today what really happened down there. She assured Finn that she wasn`t raped cause he saw to much and he wouldn`t let her get off if she wouldn`t have told him that he was just in time.

Olivia closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath. ¨He brought me into the basement where he had a mattress waiting. I was cuffed and it was hard to fight him, he pushed me onto the mattress and tried to rape me. I tried to get him off but he was to strong, he totally overpowered me and pushed me into a wall. He said: ¨Let`s make it a little more comfortable.¨ and uncuffed me. I managed to hit him and to run off, but he came after me. He cuffed me to a door and tried to force me to have oral sex with him.¨ She stopped and was wondering about herself that she used the word sex, it wasn`t sex at all, it was sexual assault and it was so close that Finn almost didn`t arrive in time.

Olivia searched for Trevors eyes again, the whole time he said absolutely nothing, he was just listening. She was sure that he heard worse stuff during his career as a lawyer and he defended the guys at court after they told him that they did things like that, so she wasn`t sure what he would do or say next.

¨ Olivia, I`m so sorry. I would have never cuffed you, if I would have known that something like this happened to you! I hope you don`t think that I would have been mad at you, if you would have said ¨No¨ to anything I wanted to do with you tonight.¨

¨No, Trevor, that wasn`t the reason. I had therapy after that and I had boyfriends and sex and it never happend something like that before. The cuffs must have been a trigger who brought back the memories. It is a long time ago since I felt something like that for anyone. I`m working SVU, do you really think that I let every man I sleep with fist me or cuff me?¨, Olivia started to laugh.

¨ And now I`m quite sure that you will run off immediately, cause this is a little much for a first date.¨

Trevor started to laugh too: ¨Well, yes, it was a little much. But do you think I play a home version of ¨50 shades of grey¨ with every woman I sleep with? Everytime, since the moment I saw you for the first time almost 10 years ago, I wanted to pull you into my arms an kiss you. I can`t believe that this is our first date. I never did stuff like this with any woman. It must have been the attitude you treated me with everytime you saw me. Like I`m a worm not worth to even talk to. It made me furious and it turned me on so bad.¨

Finally it was Olivia`s turn to smile wolfish: ¨Really, you like it to be treated like a worm?¨

¨ Oh, no young lady, if you think we can go back to have sex after what just happened then you`re wrong. He took a look onto the clock and said: ¨ It is 5:30am and I`m really glad that it is Saturday but we`re going to bed now and the only thing we`re going to do for the next few hours, is sleep.¨

Again Olivia felt really comfortable with him, she really couldn`t believe that this was their first date.

¨ Okay, let`s go to bed to sleep but don`t think that I forget about the worm thing.¨

Trevor laughed out loud: ¨No, I`m sure that you will not let me forget about this before you had the chance to show me how valuable I`m for you. And I have to admit that I`m looking forward to it, but right now it is sleeping time.¨

He stood up grasped her hand and took her with him into the bedroom. She followed him like she did it the whole night. They laid onto her bed face to face and he embraced her and pulled her close to his chest. He took her blankets and wraped it around both of them and she fell asleep smelling his skin and she felt cared for, for the first time in her life.

**Hey. let me know if I shall go on with the story or if you think it is finished. I`m not quite sure yet.**


	6. Chapter 6

Olivia couldn`t believe what was going on, it was already 2 months that she was dating Trevor Langan and they spent almost every second of their freetime with each other. For the first time in her life she couldn`t wait until her workday was over. She run out the door as soon as possible, Elliot was already suspicious about it. One monday morning, after a weekend where they only left the bed to eat, she was so sore that she couldn`t sit. The whole day she tried to avoit to sit down as often as possible and if the situation made it necessary to sit, she shifted around the chair like a little child. She had a very uncomfortable talk with Elliot afterwards, who wanted to know what was going on and if she was alright.

It was still 2hours to go and she wished it would be less, she felt like a little girl waiting for the christmas presents to get and it made it even worse that it was friday and they both would have the whole weekend off. Her phone was humming and she got excited and wet between her legs. It was unbelievable, Trevor started to right her sexmessages and she was already conditioned, as soon as her phone was humming she felt the moisture between her legs. She took the phone and opened the message, it was Trevor`s 20th message that they, just yesterday they were laughing about the fact that they were behaving like teenagers but they both couldn`t help themselves. She started to smile and to shift around her chair, he wrote: ¨I love you.¨

Olivia was shocked, that wasn`t at all what she expected. She read it again and again and wasn`t sure how to react.

¨ What happened?¨, she heard Elliot say. ¨What?¨, she looked up and was still so confused that she couldn`t think straight.

¨ I said, what happend? You look like you have seen a ghost. Is everything alright?¨, Elliot responded.

¨ Ah, yeah I`m okay.¨

She put her cellphone back into her pocket and said: ¨Are there any news about the Palmer case?¨, she asked to get Elliot off the topic. He cleared his throat and said:¨ The prosecuter is still putting all facts together and they prepare for court, didn`t he talk with you about your statement yet?¨

Acutally he did but she needed Elliot to think about somthing else than the message she just recieved and this was the first thing which came to her mind. She hated to be off the case but as a victim there was no possibility at all to work the case herself. The statement made her nervous, it was the first time that she was on the stand as a victim and not as a cop and it was totally different. She always knew, that it was hell for the victims to go through court but she never really understood what it meant to sit up there as a victim.

¨Liv, are you really okay?¨

Damn, she was to long occupied with her thoughts and Elliot was worrying again.

"Yeah I'm fine."

"Liv, I know this is hard for you. Maybe you should talk with someone about it.", Elliot said. And Olivia was even more confused - what the hell was he talking about. And then she realized that he was talking about the assult but what was really bothering her, was what Trevor just wrote in his last message.

She shoke her head to clear her thoughts and said: "I'm fine, El."

Elliot didn't like that at all, she spoke the exact same words before to him and she wasn't fine at all the last time.


	7. Chapter 7

Olivia was nervous, she was on the way to meet Trevor and she didn't write him back when she recieved his last message. She still couldn't believe what he wrote, how could he? They were dating for two months, how could he write her that he loves her.

First she was shocked, then she was angry and now she was pissed, he was destroying everything. She tried to calm herself down, he did nothing wrong, he just pushed her weakest point. On a intellectual base she knows that it is stupid but her childhood experiences were way to dramatic to just ignore them, they left deep scares behind, even if she tries to fight it. She always couldn't trust people if they came to close, boyfriends who wanted to move in with her or even who wanted to push their relationship onto an other level were always suspicious to her. She couldn't understand how they could love her, how could anyone love her at all? She was brought to this world by force. Her mum didn't love her and if not the mother who else in the world could ever love someone.

She knows that this is stupid and she can see George sitting in front of her giving her a psychiatric speech about how irrational this is. She knows that all, that's the reason why she never talked with someone about it, but the knowledge doesn't change her feelings.

She would meet Trevor in his appartment this would make it easier, she can just tell him that it is over and then she can leave.

She felt a tear running down her face and was asking herself why she was crying. And she realized that she didn't want to leave, she really started to like him, she felt so comfortable with him. She stopped the car at the sideway and started to hit the steering wheel. She did not know what to do next, it was to much everything was overpowering her, she wanted to run off but she does not want to lose him, she felt like a stupid 16year old girl and not like a grown up woman. And then she had suddenly an image in her head, she saw herself with Trevor and she was happy and the feeling to talk to him became overpowering, she wanted to talk to him about her fear and what he did to her by saying that he loves her and she knew that this was one of this rare moments in life where you realize that your life will take a different path depending on the decision you make right in that moment.

And she made the decision, she wanted it all, a partner, a family, beeing happy, a normal life with normal problems and she wanted it with him, she just wanted him to slow down a little bit and she was going to tell him.

She drove to his appartment and was shaking when she pressed the doorbell. He opened the door holding the dishtowel in his hands trying to dry them. He looked at her and immediately asked: "What happened? Is someone hurt?"

She forgott that she must look as if she went through hell, cause her face was still wet from the tears.

"No, everything is alright, can I come in", she weakly responded.

"I'm sorry, come in.", he said. "Olivia, what happened?"

"You said you love me, after two months of dating and you send it as a textmessage, how do you wanted me to react to that?" she aggressively said.

He was absolutely confused. "That is the reason why you were crying? Olivia, I didn't wanna hurt you by saying that and I admit that it wasn't one of my best moments to send it as a textmessage. But I didn't realize how bad I would hurt you by saying that I love you."

Suddenly she was so tired she just wanted to stopp talking, she had a headache and she thought maybe it was a bad idea to come to his appartment. She turned away from him and burried her head in her hands. "You know what, I shouldn't have come here. I'm really tired and I'm not feeling well, I should leave.", she said preparing herself to leave and to crawl back into her shell where she spent all her life in and what she just a few minutes ago so bravely wanted to leave.

She felt Trevor stepping closer to her. "No, you're not running away from me." "Trevor, please?" "You don't know how messed up I am. You should not get involved believe me, you should leave right now, as long as nobody gets hurt."

"Olivia, what the hell happened to you that you don't feel yourself worth to be loved by anyone. Please, don't push me away. Give me a chance, please?"

She started to cry again and she turned around and embraced him, she pulled him close to her body and laid her head onto his chest. He started to stroke her hair and after a while he said: "Come on, let us try something from the fantastic pasta I made and then we just lay down and sleep, we can discuss everything else after some food and sleep. And she gave in again and let him take the lead.


	8. Chapter 8

Olivia woke up cause the smell of the fresh made coffee made it impossible to go on sleeping. Her head was still hurting and she felt like she had a huge hangover, she blamed the crying for it, cause crying is almost as exhausting as drinking. She did not want to face Trevor cause she was so embarrassed about what happened the evening before. But it was impossible to not face him and while she was thinking how she could buy herself a little bit more time before she has to leave the bed, the door was pushed open and Trevor came in with a full tray. There was everything on it what you could wish for at a saturday morning breakfast. Coffee, eggs, bacon, orange juice, fruits even croissants which were still warm and she was wondering how he managed to have warm croissants for breakfast on a early saturday.

She blushed when he came in and he started to smile.

¨Actually, that isn't funny", she whispered. "No, it's not I'm sorry, but on the other hand yes it is. A little bit.", he smiled at her.

"It scared the hell out of me when I recieved your message yesterday.", she responded weak.

"Well, yes I could see that and again it wasn't my greatest moment, but I ment what I said and I still do." Did she really hear right, did he just say again that he loves her. Again she was impressed and intimidated by his confidence.

"Trevor, you can't say stuff like this to me, especially after only two months of whatever we had going.", she said with a more aggressive tone, cause she started to hate how she felt. She felt as a little child again and she felt that he wasn't respecting her at all.

"Olivia, I didn't mean to hurt you, really, but to be honest I don't really understand what the problem is. The last two months were the greatest months of my life and I really do love you and I thought you feel the same."

"I do.", she didn't know where this came from, she was shocked and stared at him, she didn't wanna say that but when she opened her mouth it just came out, so suddenly she couldn't stop it.

"I'm really bad with all this, realtionships scare me.", again she felt tearing up and didn't know how to stop it, what the hell was wrong with her.

Trevor stood up walked around the bed and motioned her to move a little so that he could sit next to her. He put his arm around her and she put her head against his shoulder, it felt totally natural to do that.

"Yeah, it came to my mind once or twice that all this is a little to much, but I can tell you something right now. I'm waiting for you since ten years and I think this is already enough lost time. I will not give up on you and I will not let you scare me away.", he took her chin and turned her head around to look into your eyes. "Do you understand me?"

It wasn't at all scary what he said. It was smooth and comferting and she felt protected and safe, normally she only feels like that if Elliot is around.

He leaned in and started to kiss her face, so soft that she wasn't sure if he really touched her or if she just imagined it. Suddenly she wanted to feel him, she put her hand on the back of his head and pulled him closer. "Kiss me harder!", she moaned.

Trevor loosened her grip and took the tray to put it on the floor, then he went back to the bed and pulled Olivia into the middle of the bed. Olivia sat up and took the shirt off, she was wearing while she was sleeping. Trevor was already pulling her panties down and when she was finished throwing her shirt away he already spread her legs and pushed his hand between them. She let herself fall back to the bed and took Trevor with her. It felt good to have his whole weight onto her, he was a lot taller than her and he was heavy but she liked it how his weight pressed her into the bed. She kissed him deep and she felt his hand entering her and she felt how his dick hardened. She opened his pants and closed her hand around him, he moaned now too and she was sure that she could make him come immediately but she didn't want that.

She wanted to taste him, so she made him switch places with her and sat on top of him, then she wandered down his body to take him into her mouth. He groaned out loud and she could feel how he got even bigger and she had to let him go a little bit to breath and swallow. "Olivia, I can't hold it back any longer.", she heard him moaning. But she wasn't in the mood to let him go, she wanted to taste him so she hardend her grip and teased him even more with her tongue and he came into her mouth. She swalloed everything and started to kiss his legs to give him time to relax a little and to start breathing again, what he almost stopped doing while she had pushed him over the edge. Suddenly she felt a hard grip, he took her by her hair and pulled her up to his face, he was still breathing hard and his whole body was still shivering from the orgasm he just had. He started to kiss her deep and didn't lose the grip and she really liked that, it was all about the trust again and she wanted that more than ever before. She wanted him to do with her what ever he wants, even the thought of it made her so wet that she could feel the moisture between her legs.

He could taste himself while he was kissing her and he wanted more, he felt the need to push deep inside her so he turned around and placed her under him. He sat on top of her and looked her into her eyes to get the permission to go on, she was already very far gone but he could feel her wetness and it made him almost go crazy. He leaned into her face and said: "Spread your legs!" She did what he said and it took him all his strength to not immediately push into her. He started to kiss her labia and when he heard how she groaned out his name he pushed his tongue into her. Her body started to buckle and she clinched into the bedsheet she bit her lips and fellt herself so close to the edge that she wasn't sure if she could hold on any second longer, but right in that moment when she felt the orgasm coming he stopped and she came down a little. He did this three times and she was so wet and so turned on that she screamed out loud. From far away she heard Trevor saying: "So, you want me to let you come, right?" She nooded cause she felt to weak for any other response. She felt him entering her with his finger but she was to wet to really feel his fingers inside her with pleasure. He softly started to massage her clit and she heard herself begging: "Trevor, please, please!"

He enjoyed how she screamed his name and he put a little bit more pressure onto her clit. Olivia felt the little sharp pain when he pressed her clit and then she felt the soft waves of relieve coming and she was so glad cause she thought she would explode if he wouldn't end it right that moment.

When she could breath again, she pulled him back on top of her cause the first orgasm wans't enough to take the wetness between her legs away and she pulled her legs around his hips so that he didn't have another chance than entering her.

After she made him come again and he made her come again they lay in bed, she snuggled onto his breast and she was falling asleep again, she felt him kissing her forehead and stroking her hair and she closed her eyes and allowed herself to just be happy without any fear or doubts about the future or the past.

**Reviews are very welcome!**


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